"But God, Sir, in Your manner of teaching us about life's consequential nature, isn't death a bit ... um ... extreme, pedagogically speaking?"

"I know the lesson that we're studying is difficult. But dying is more homework than I was counting on."

Writes P.J. O'Rourke, who will -- in all likelihood -- survive his "inglorious" cancer.

Perhaps one of your body parts is lying in wait and will, one day, rise up and drag you to your doom. If it has to be one body part, what body part would you want it to be? Surely not that one.